17.05.15!
I am unmarried and not committed to anything at the moment but my work and career.i have friends who are of "marriageable age" and their families are helping them get them a suitable husband.i know our generation is absolutely against the concept of arranged marriages but I don't completely agree with them.i may say my opinion lies somewhere in the middle of agreement or disagreement.agreement because a large percentage of Indians undergo the rigorous procedure of arranged marriage and emerge victorious, and I am not talking about the statistics here because they would include a large number of rural population who get married against their wishes and put up with shit at times due to various circumstances.i am talking about the statistics here because they would include a large number of rural population who get married against their wishes and put up with shit at times due to various circumstances.i am talking about the urban population,the common urban man or woman who would want someone as career oriented as themselves,fun loving,have a few common interests and a social person.so many of my relatives and friends have literally found their soul mates through the ritual of Arranged marriages.
But what about those who did not emerge victorious,what about those whose experiences were sour.who are those people?
You are right-they are the ones who are not so attractive,be it from fat to dark to those suffering from Any medical ailment.for those absolutely perfect human beings this experience is a bit sour,I may interrupt here to tell that there are MANY exceptions to this rule too.just for reference I know a girl who was brought up telling that if you don't change then you will have a tough time finding a good guy for yourself,and let me tell you she found her soul mate through arranged marriage and I couldn't have been happier for her because however she is on the exterior I am yet to meet someone as kind and compassionate as her.
Our society has evolved over the years from losing the ghunghat to adapting to microminis but what I find difficult to accept is that there are still the same conservative people dressed up in the garb of being very liberal walking amongst us in our very own social circles and that mask comes off when they go around seeking a FAIR THIN AND STAY AT HOME BRIDE for their sons who are definitely the apple of their eyes!
I have had personal experiences with these people, and many of whom I call friends, in fact I had a friend, he was a very understanding and well behaved boy.just the other day we were talking abou
t plans post our exams and he said marriage is definitely on the cards but he was facing a problem,the girls he met were just NOT FAIR ENOUGH! I literally gasped at that answer and at the risk of jeopardising my friendship I told him but you yourself are so dark and do you really think her skin tone will determine how compatible you guys will be?hes a good chap and did not take much offence.he replied I am dark but I am a boy.
I was just taken aback,but still I didn't judge him for his requirements of a happy married life,I was amazed for a few days but I understood -to each his own!
But what I can't really comprehend is that why is the requirement of a man considered so justifiable and not a woman's?if a woman asks for a wealthy husband then why is she told to understand that wealth doesn't make a happy marriage, or if she says I want someone who shall allow me to work even after marriage or someone who says I won't cook or someone who says I don't want to have kids at all!why are her demands considered ruthless if she says she can't go through the pain of having kids! I as a doctor have known the procedure from top to bottom,in fact the very 1st delivery I conducted made me decide to never have kids,of course that decision changed but it didn't for many other girls that I know and they were scolded a lot for even having this notion!!And the world says deepika padukone is wrong when she says it's my choice and my life on your screens!.I still continue to hold a very deep friendship with my friend but if I can look past his requirement and not judge him for that then why can't the world just know those really pretty girls who are not so pretty on the exterior and judge them for their nature,their inner beauty and the huge pinnacles they are very much capable of achieving!
and here it is that I disagree with arranged marriages,with the ever compromising girl saying that's how I was told that it would be.i wish the exceptions to this rule continue to ever increase and then arranged marriages can be a very fruitful and fun experience to many!
it's time we decide who are worthy of our explanations and who can just be left alone to talk and gossip about our choices!
I am unmarried and not committed to anything at the moment but my work and career.i have friends who are of "marriageable age" and their families are helping them get them a suitable husband.i know our generation is absolutely against the concept of arranged marriages but I don't completely agree with them.i may say my opinion lies somewhere in the middle of agreement or disagreement.agreement because a large percentage of Indians undergo the rigorous procedure of arranged marriage and emerge victorious, and I am not talking about the statistics here because they would include a large number of rural population who get married against their wishes and put up with shit at times due to various circumstances.i am talking about the statistics here because they would include a large number of rural population who get married against their wishes and put up with shit at times due to various circumstances.i am talking about the urban population,the common urban man or woman who would want someone as career oriented as themselves,fun loving,have a few common interests and a social person.so many of my relatives and friends have literally found their soul mates through the ritual of Arranged marriages.But what about those who did not emerge victorious,what about those whose experiences were sour.who are those people?
You are right-they are the ones who are not so attractive,be it from fat to dark to those suffering from Any medical ailment.for those absolutely perfect human beings this experience is a bit sour,I may interrupt here to tell that there are MANY exceptions to this rule too.just for reference I know a girl who was brought up telling that if you don't change then you will have a tough time finding a good guy for yourself,and let me tell you she found her soul mate through arranged marriage and I couldn't have been happier for her because however she is on the exterior I am yet to meet someone as kind and compassionate as her.
Our society has evolved over the years from losing the ghunghat to adapting to microminis but what I find difficult to accept is that there are still the same conservative people dressed up in the garb of being very liberal walking amongst us in our very own social circles and that mask comes off when they go around seeking a FAIR THIN AND STAY AT HOME BRIDE for their sons who are definitely the apple of their eyes!
I have had personal experiences with these people, and many of whom I call friends, in fact I had a friend, he was a very understanding and well behaved boy.just the other day we were talking abou
t plans post our exams and he said marriage is definitely on the cards but he was facing a problem,the girls he met were just NOT FAIR ENOUGH! I literally gasped at that answer and at the risk of jeopardising my friendship I told him but you yourself are so dark and do you really think her skin tone will determine how compatible you guys will be?hes a good chap and did not take much offence.he replied I am dark but I am a boy.
I was just taken aback,but still I didn't judge him for his requirements of a happy married life,I was amazed for a few days but I understood -to each his own!
But what I can't really comprehend is that why is the requirement of a man considered so justifiable and not a woman's?if a woman asks for a wealthy husband then why is she told to understand that wealth doesn't make a happy marriage, or if she says I want someone who shall allow me to work even after marriage or someone who says I won't cook or someone who says I don't want to have kids at all!why are her demands considered ruthless if she says she can't go through the pain of having kids! I as a doctor have known the procedure from top to bottom,in fact the very 1st delivery I conducted made me decide to never have kids,of course that decision changed but it didn't for many other girls that I know and they were scolded a lot for even having this notion!!And the world says deepika padukone is wrong when she says it's my choice and my life on your screens!.I still continue to hold a very deep friendship with my friend but if I can look past his requirement and not judge him for that then why can't the world just know those really pretty girls who are not so pretty on the exterior and judge them for their nature,their inner beauty and the huge pinnacles they are very much capable of achieving!
and here it is that I disagree with arranged marriages,with the ever compromising girl saying that's how I was told that it would be.i wish the exceptions to this rule continue to ever increase and then arranged marriages can be a very fruitful and fun experience to many!
it's time we decide who are worthy of our explanations and who can just be left alone to talk and gossip about our choices!
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